Dogs can’t do geometry

Please imagine the following:

Two dogs intent on catching the rabbit if Dad (me) would just get his lard butt over here and open the door.

Rabbit, unconcerned, munching greens over behind the dog run.

Rabbit warren – and safety from dogs - is under the shed.

Dogs are closer to the shed than is the rabbit.

In geometric terms, we’re talking more or less about an isosceles triangle. The long hypotenuse side is   the path the rabbit needs to run in order to find safety under the shed. The dogs merely have to shoot down one of the short legs – preferably the one leading directly from the back door to the shed – at a speed more or less matching that of the rabbit to beat it to the shed.

You know what’s going to happen, right?

Hand on door…ready…go! (Crashing and much cussing from Dad as two dogs try to go through the door before it’s sufficiently open to allow them to pass through.)

Dogs run to where rabbit’s starting position was, except…

Rabbit, being no fool, heard the clamor and made a streak down the hypotenuse for the safety of the warren under the shed.

Dogs then run down the long leg, now far behind the rabbit, and end up looking stupid trying to stick dog-sized snouts down rabbit-sized hole.

Rabbit family cracks up laughing as youngest rabbit son paints another dog silhouette on the warren wall.

Dogs slink to the back door, refusing to look Dad in the eye.