The ugly wife

(Note to reader: Don’t know why I didn’t post this one at the time – last summer – but here it is now.)

So, I’m sitting in the waiting room of a Ford dealership in Schiller Park Illinois at about 7:15 this morning, waiting to find out if I need to spend a few grand on my transmission before I can start the 2300 mile drive home. Now, you might think my mood was kinda low, given the circumstances. And you would be right, except for a news item that changed my day.

There were four of us within earshot when a story came on about some guy who is suing his wife for divorce on the basis of fraud. It seems that the morning after the wedding night was the first time this schlub had seen his beloved without her makeup and he was displeased at the revelation.

Hmmm, I say.

But my waiting room posse said more than hmmm. In fact, the other man and woman waiting for their bad car news and the cashier behind the counter all broke into riotous laughter. After a beat, so did I.

Sometimes, other people’s problems sort of make your own recede into insignificance. And that poor woman’s problems makes my broken car seem less important than a hangnail.

The real question here is not how this idiot managed to get to the marriage bed before he decided he didn’t like his wife’s looks. The real question is how she got to the marriage bed without noticing what a slug she was marrying.

Anyway, not that I am one to revel in the problems of others but I do have to admit this was the most jovial waiting room experience I can recall.