Measures

Words don’t mean the same to everyone and this particularly applies to words of measurement.

Well, some do. If you’re using avoirdupois or metric and applying a term traceable to an international standard, then of course a cup is a cup and a meter thirty-nine-point-something-or-other inches. An angstrom is a specific and precise unit. (Okay, I had to say that in case the ASTM thought police read this. And now, we return to our regular programming…)

From our first dawning knowledge that the sounds issuing from our mothers’ moving lips carried meaning, we’ve gradually come to know that some of those sounds, repeated over time and enhanced by facial expressions and hand motions and of course, context carry meanings that are at once both well-defined and infinitely adjustable. And we tend to grow up accepting our mothers’ definitions of things, including units of measure.

Take some. No,no, not “take some!” Take, “some.” It’s a word we use every day and it could mean any quantity from three to three million, an ounce to a long tonne. In my mother’s lexicon, it meant a quantity appropriate to the item in question. “Some” ice cream meant a single serving, which in our house was probably more substantial than in some of yours. To Mom, “some” meant as much or as many as needed and no more. Not the same for my Dad. “Some” nails meant enough to join the boards in question together plus another half dozen or so that would end up bent on the floor of the garage. But of course, that had more to do with Dad’s shortcomings as a carpenter than any failure on his part to properly estimate the need.

“Many” is a similarly slippery term. How many is many? Depends. Do you mean many as in a lot or many as in “I didn’t see many,” which is sort of a limiting quantification. “Lot” sort of fills the same usage niche, except when used by a wide-eyed young’un, as in “there were a LOT of them.”

Yeah, expressions of quantity or magnitude could be confusing growing up in our house and neighborhood. But over time and with accumulated experience and maturity, I believe I’ve got a handle on some of the most used terms, so I figured I’d share them with you. Herewith, some definitions, courtesy of Marion’s baby boy:

Soon = Not yet, and if you keep asking, then maybe never.

Smidgen = A quantity that I’m hoping you won’t think is too much, because I really like this stuff.

Passel = More than some, occasionally more than many, but usually not a LOT of them.

Bunch = In carrots, about seven. In flowers, however many I could afford. In all else, some. Occasionally many, as in “They was a bunch of ‘em!”

More than enough = You’ll probably have to share.

Plenty = See “more than enough.”

Units of time can be similarly catalogued:

Days = Three days

Days and days = Four days

Days on end = Longer than Mom found appropriate.

All hours (as in noise from next door until all hours) = Until eleven p.m.

Almost all night = At least thirty seconds past midnight

Way too late = Later than I’d prefer.

As you may have surmised by now, not all of the terms I learned from my Mom are exacting in any definitive sense. But there is no doubt in my mind what they mean, each and all. I’m betting each of you has equivalent – though perhaps not necessarily similar – definitions for each of these terms.

That’s okay. I declare my definitions the correct ones, if for no other reason than I grew up in Marion’s house.

I didn’t promise to be reasonable.